21 Feb 2007 — Just when I thought I haven’t updated my 老爸大道理 section for a while…

From: Yinn Gim
Date: Feb 21, 2007 8:25 AM
Subject: diving
To: Tiffany

Dad

So yes all you avid divers out there, you heard what my dad said, if you want to live to a ripe old age, you better stick to snorkelling… speaking of which, a parting shot:

Who’s this? Me lah!

2 Jan 2007 — Received a really lovely email from my laoba for new year’s. Very jialat, because I was in the office, almost burst out crying when I read it, especially the last bit about Milou, our cat, that passed away on 27 September at 7.45pm after succumbing to kidney failure. I’m sure he’s in a happy place now. Heh heh and of course, laoba being laoba, can’t help sending a few fatherly words of advice along with all his well-wishes.

Hi girl,

Mum, dad, Seannie and Bubble. ( we miss Meeloo at this time )

16 Oct 2006 — Ah… it’s 16 Oct! The first day since 26 Sep that Billie and I are FINALLY alone again… sigh… a quiet house all to ourselves… and in true form, Bi is walking around once more in his maroon undies (hee hee, never provide visuals here so as not to scare kids off). And yay… after 21 days, tonight no need to sleep on air mattress anymore!

So yes, last night, after two weeks, we finally sent my mother-in-law off.

Phew… Read more »

More from my Laoba’s brand of humour: (please take no offense if you happen to like going for buffets or complain about your weight)

Hi girl,

Mum went for lunch buffet yesterday and it reminded me of ‘buffet spread’

The word means ‘woman with big bottom’. If you notice, most people and especially women who attend buffet lunch, buffet dinner or buffet where ever there are makan for ‘one price eat all you can’ are in the bigger size category. Why? Because you can keep on eating for 3 or 4 hours non stop. Also to make sure that it is value for their money, better if it is 10 times worth what they are paying. Worst of all is they will gather the same size gang and go together, eat and gossip for the whole 3 or 4 hours. (Eh Tommy, is my dad talking about us?!?)

That remind me of another thing.

Mum is now wearing clothing with size XL and she is not very please. (Erh… dunno if this part has been approved by my mum or not?!?) All women are born vain. Some are worse, like your mum. I have been hearing her talking about her weight for god knows when. (Oh, so it runs in the family! Now I know where I got it from!) She feel shy when she goes into a shop and the sales person ask for her size.

I think the manufacturing companies must change sizing to ‘ JS ‘, ‘ JM ‘ & ‘ JL ‘. ( J for JUMBO ) the vain can say ‘ junior ‘ so not so embrassing lor! Save on sewing cost and time - XL, XXL, XXXL or maybe next time XYZZZZL.

love,
dad

I’m proud to announce that my dad has just won a Philips Hairdryer contest. Here’s his e-mail to me to announce the happy news, and following that the story he submitted to Philips. He’s so funny and cute.

Hi Girl,

Love from dad.
Read more »

12 August 2005 — While I’ve been taking a little break to nurse myself back to health, (besides when you’re home all day, not leaving the house once, there’s only that much to blog about) my dad has been very busy “taking over” for me. Thank you 老爸! So here are a few more anecdotes from his library of unuseless information… One last point to mention, the last story on this page where he bitches about a very very distant cousin, and gushes about his own daughter, that’s only HIS view point. I take no responsibility. At first I thought I should remove it, so pai-seh, but then not so nice to censor him lah. So I thank you for your kind understanding…
Read more »

9 August 2005 — Hi everyone! It’s been almost a week since I launched the site, and I would just like to thank everyone who’s sent me such kind words of encouragement and support. Heng ah! No hate mail yet… but truth be told, the 2 persons I was most worried about with regards to response were my parents (strange but somehow at 29, I still look for my parents’ approval), especially my dad, ‘cos I didn’t know how he would take the “老爸大道理” section. Would he be upset? angry? mebbe even disown me? But I’m glad to announce that my parents are very happy for me too. Yay!!! And my dad, wow, he’s totally embraced it. In fact, I’m beginning to suspect that he’s trying to steal my thunder… He’s even penning his own thoughts! Haha! This you’ve got to read…
Read more »

24 July 2005 — When I told my dad about my scary 被鬼压 incident, he seriously concluded:

1. There was a spider with 9 legs crawling right above me on the ceiling
2. I’m suffering from adrenal exhaustion. “That’s why when you’re very tired, never sleep on your back.”

or if you happen to have had that experience in a hotel room
3. It’s because “the ghost with the big head” has occupied the room while it was vacant, and you came in and lie on the bed in the same position as “he”. So the remedy? Shift the bed slightly, and for good measure, pray to the four corners of the hotel room.

No lah, I don’t believe in buying white gold. I still prefer yellow gold. Only yellow gold has value, you don’t see governments trading in white gold and diamonds. They only trade in yellow gold. Governments need to have the yellow gold in order to print money. If every country just start printing their own money, the money would be worth nothing. All this is controlled by the World Bank in Switzerland. You have to pledge at the world bank in order to print money. How much gold you have, how much money you can print, you understand or not? I don’t believe in buying white gold. White gold? What to do with it? You tell me. When you bring to pawn shop, the pawn shop also don’t want. Better buy yellow gold for investment… Tell William, when he’s earning money to buy a Rolex. Rolex is also a form of investment. Yah, when you start working and saving money, the best thing to do is buy yellow gold and Rolex.

Ayers Rock - Don’t take the rocks or sand from Uluru as souvenirs as they will bring misfortune. Some tourists who had previously done so found themselves surrounded by so much bad luck that they even made another trip back to return these “souvenirs”! (Source Unknown, some article somewhere)

Great Barrier Reef - Strait Times reports that there will be another tsunami coming soon, don’t play a fool. Japan is again affected by earthquakes, the earth is moving. Do you know how to tell when the tsunami is approaching? It’s when the tide is pulling all the water away from the beach, from that time, you have three minutes until the tsunami hits! Anyway, better don’t go to the sea!